Thank you to everyone who prayed for us during my mom’s illness and passing. You have been with me through it all and I have appreciated all the messages and prayers. Some of you wanted to read my mom’s eulogy after I read the first paragraph in Instastories. I am happy to share it with you.
Mom’s Eulogy
I remember once watching the Sound of Music with my mom. She told me that the first time she saw the movie, she really identified with Maria. She, too, thought about joining the convent and dedicating her life to God. But as the movie progressed, and Maria fell in love with the Captain and became a mom to many children, she thought oh, no, no, no. Her life would be nothing like that. Well, sometimes life doesn’t turn out as you planned. Little did she know that she would dedicate her life to God, but it would be as a wife and mom to many children.
If I had to describe my mom in five words –it would be strong, faith-filled, caring, outgoing and funny. Even when she was sick at the end of her life, those traits were still there, in fact, they were even more apparent.
Mom was the strongest person I ever knew, and not because she was perfect. As the oldest, I saw her in the days before God was a part of her life. But, I also saw how God completely transformed her life. With her healing and facing the pain of her childhood, she broke the cycle of dysfunction of generations and with my dad she started a new family life rooted in Christ.
As a result, her nine children are all decent people, 😉 but more importantly, they love God and they’re living for God. That is her greatest legacy – the faith she passed on to new generations in our family. In that faith, she taught us that it was more than just going to church on Sundays. She lived her faith 24/7. It was just a part of who she was. This was especially apparent in her love language of service. She was generous and always doing something to help someone else. She did not hesitate to change her schedule around just to help us, even if it meant driving hundreds of miles to be with us when we needed her most. Whether she was helping family, a friend, cleaning the houses of a parish priest, or visiting someone in the hospital, she shared her love by helping others.
However, mom wasn’t a quiet and shrinking violet type of Catholic. She was more like a John the Baptist. She wasn’t afraid to speak up. She didn’t let worry about what others would think stop her from sharing something that was essential for the good of that person. It was always done out of love, but it was done. This extended to the protection of her family. When she was in Mama Bear mode, watch out. She fought fiercely for those she loved.
However, mom was also very down to earth and friendly. We would marvel at the way she could make friends with complete strangers as she waited in line at the grocery store. She was at ease talking to other people. And how she loved to make people laugh! She loved getting a room going with one of her stories. Some of my fondest memories were of her dancing in the kitchen with my dad, being goofy, laughing and joking around. She was the fun grandma who played with her grandkids, went on rides at Disneyland and made sure the kitchen was stocked with their favorite snacks. Mom knew how to have fun, how to find joy in the mundane and she knew how to laugh at life. Even on her deathbed, she was making jokes and plotting how we could smuggle into her ICU room a slice of chocolate cream pie and a Coors Light beer.
But in the end, just being with mom made you happy. Although there were nine of us kids, mom managed to make each of us feel loved and special. That love of family only intensified in the last days of her life. I’ll never forget the smile on her face when she was finally brought home. It brings to mind some of the last words she spoke to us. She was not afraid to die and was at peace with God’s will and she said, “
I lived a good life. I’ve had a lot of fun with you guys. Our lives weren’t perfect, but one thing we did always have was love in our hearts for each other, forgiveness and mercy. When push came to shove, we were always there for each other no matter what our differences. And that was important to me. And what’s also important to me is that you pass on this faith and teach your little guys. I see that in all of you, being such a good examples to the children and producing beautiful vines for the future.
We will do our best to carry on mom’s legacy and although we’ll all miss mom’s laughs, hugs, feistiness, words of wisdom, and emoji filled texts, we know that she hasn’t left us alone and she is watching over us and praying for us even more now. We love you, mom. We’ll miss you.
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Word of the Year
Disneyland with my mom then and now.
